This weekend I will be turning 42. Unlike many people, I don't dread the idea of turning another year older. I'm looking forward to celebrating my birthday this weekend, on Friday night with my boyfriend, on Saturday night with my friends, and on Sunday with my kids. However, my social plans are not the reason I look forward to my birthday.
To me, turning another year older means I've accomplished something. I've lived another year. I've survived another year. I've parented my kids for another year, dealt with all kinds of bullshit for another year, been there for my friends and my clients another year, and have beat cancer for another year. Having a birthday doesn't mean I'm getting old and closer to the end of life. It doesn't mean I'm slower than I was, or have more wrinkles or grey hair. It means I've been successful in navigating the ups and downs of life for yet another year. A birthday is not something that I fear, but rather something that I cherish, because quite simply, it means I've gotten to live another year.
One Republic released a song in 2013 called "I lived". Below are some lyrics from the song:
"I...I did it all, I...I did it all,
I owned every second that this world could give.
I saw so many places, the things that I did.
Yeah with every broken bone, I swear I lived.
Hope that you spend your days,
But they all add up.
And when that sun goes down,
Hope you raise your cup."
This song is a reminder to me that we should embrace and savor every moment that we experience, good or bad. It is a reminder to appreciate all that life has to offer. It emphasizes the idea of living your life to the fullest and not backing down or away from it, because at the end, it will have all been worth it. I like to remind myself on every birthday just how much I have to be grateful for, and how much I have accomplished.
There is a quote by baseball player Satchel Paige that says, "How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?" This is a worthwhile question to consider. I'm told I don't look 42. I certainly don't feel 42. I'm not quite sure how old I do feel. I've lived a lot of life. I've experienced a lot of things, some better than others. I've had to face obstacles, yet I've known pure joy. I am grateful that I have been able to experience the world in the way that I have. I am even thankful for the hard times that have come along, because they have helped me to appreciate the good ones even more. I don't know how old I would be if I didn't know how old I was...yet, I know that I am happy to be whatever age I am!
There's a saying that you can't have your cake and eat it too. Some people feel that they can't be happy about a birthday because it means they are aging. They can't have one without the other. However, acknowledging my birthday as an accomplishment rather than a disappointment, no matter how old I get, is my version of having my cake and eating it too (especially if it's a chocolate birthday cake!). So, when your birthday comes along, blow out your candles with enthusiasm, reflect on all you have experienced, and then go ahead and have your cake, and eat it too!
